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Are You Chasing Someone Else’s Idea of Success?
What Does Success Look Like For You? If you’re like most of us, your first thoughts about what you wanted to do when you grew up came from the people you liked and admired. If you liked your teacher, you may have wanted to become a teacher. If your father was a passionate musician, you
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Let Go of Looking Back
One of my favorite lines from the tv show Vikings happens when Ragnar and his fleet are leaving home. Two boys are watching the shore and Ragnar says, “Don’t waste your time looking back. We’re not going that way.” Powerful! Why Looking Back is a Waste of Time While I actually think it’s a good
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Why “I Just Want to be Comfortable” Isn’t Enough
Could You Be Setting Your Bar Too Low? I have a lot of clients who say “I just want to be comfortable.” It sounds like a reasonable request. It’s not greedy. It’s not asking for a lot, so what’s wrong with that? I’m not here to tell anyone how to live or what you want,
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Why You Say Yes When You Mean No And How to Stop
Unappreciated? Resentful? Over Committed? Does that sound familiar? That’s a gigantic clue that you are saying yes when you mean no. Someone asks for a favor or you see someone in need, and you step right up to help out and save the day. It feels good for a moment, then reality sets in and
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How to Show Up and Stop Hiding Your True Self
What Does Hiding Look Like People hide to stay safe. It’s typically shame driven and comes from the deep fear that if others see who we really are, they won’t like us and will abandon us. The truth is, it hurts us because not only do others not get to know us, we don’t get
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Are You Sacrificing Sleep For More Time For Yourself?
“There’s Not Enough Time in the Day” How often do you say this? Do you make “more” time for cleaning, self-care, cooking, leisure, and social time by skimping on sleep? Maybe it’s time to let that go. There are many studies that look at the high cost of sleep deprivation. Let’s look at the statistics.
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Stop Wasting Your Time Trying to Fix People
Why Fixing People is a Waste of Time We’re all taught to be kind and help others. It makes us feel good. It is a way to contribute to society, so why is fixing people a bad thing? The answer lies in the line between helping and fixing. We help people we see as equals
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What You Didn’t Know About Yelling But Should
“But he only listens when I yell” This is what I hear from all my clients who admit to an angry communication issue. It’s not true, and it’s not a reason to justify screaming. Yelling Inhibits Trust and Understanding Yelling is a power play to state “I am mightier than you.” It’s a way of
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Why You Should Let Go of Being a Good Person
We teach our children to “be good,” but is that a great idea? Here are two strong arguments against it It’s Judgmental Life is complicated. Stealing to feed your family isn’t the same as stealing to feed your drug habit. Lying to save someone’s life isn’t the same as lying to get away with being
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Why You Need to Stop Sending Dick Pics
Does This Really Need to Be Said? I guess it does because today I got a dick pic. It’s Sexual Harassment Yep. Receiving unwanted nudity is sexual harassment. It’s illegal. It’s A Boundary Violation Sending something to someone who didn’t ask for it is a clear boundary violation. It’s Potentially Traumatizing If you send a