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How Being Intellectually Lazy Makes You a Poor Leader
Oh, no! I’m a lazy thinker! Nobody thinks that they are intellectually lazy, but you won’t know until you examine the evidence. Here are the signs. “Research” is sound bites Details, schemetails. A second hand quote or line or two will do! Don’t consider you could be wrong You’re overconfident and a bit too sure.
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“It Wasn’t Me!” How Defensiveness is Not Attractive
It’s Time to Upgrade Your Definition of Sexy When we’re twenty-one, the only criterion that most of us have for defining whether someone is attractive or not is looks. It’s an “If the exterior looks good, I want it” type of attitude. However, once you get burned by that a time or two, it’s time
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How to Tell if You Have a Savior Complex
Helping others is a good thing. Volunteering, taking a stand against oppression of all sorts, and being a good citizen benefits everyone. So where is the line between simply being a good person and having a savior complex? What Is a Savior Complex? A savior complex is a compulsion to seek out people who you
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Where Is the Line Between Isolating And Me Time?
Is Fall the Season for Isolation? It’s fall. The sun is rising later and setting earlier. Fifty degrees in February feels positively balmy, but in October it sends me inside for a blanket and a fire. So quite naturally people are spending more time indoors and less time socializing. Alone time can be healthy and
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How Too Much Stuff Messes Up Your Vibe
Are you awash in clutter? It’s All About Your Emotions! Psst! Let me tell you a secret. That clutter in on your desk, inside your closet, and in your car? It represents your inner world, your emotions. Yes, it’s a way to distract yourself from what you don’t want to feel. It’s a way of
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How to Know When To Let It Burn Down
It’s Scorpio Season! It’s Time to Burn It Down! If you ever want to see what time it is, look to Nature. Fall is the season of death and destruction The new moon in Scorpio came in with a bang! She’s highlighting everything whose time has come and she’s not being subtle. Scorpio keywords are
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People Pleasing: Why We Do It and How to Stop
“I Just Want to Be Nice” Many people pleasers think that they do what they do because they want to be nice. They think they are helping. People please is a trauma response. It’s called fawning. We do it to stay safe, avoid criticism, fit in, and feel good about ourselves. It’s a way to
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How to Stop Objectifying People
Why Objectifying People is a Problem Objectification in western society is so common that we don’t even respond to it. It’s an accepted norm. We talk about celebrities as if they aren’t real people with real feelings. We post photos of strangers in Walmart with captions so others can laugh at them. Young, scantily clad
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Why Stonewalling is a Powerful Relationship Killer
What’s Stonewalling? Are You Doing It? Stonewalling is an unhealthy response to conflict. Lots of people who don’t know how to resolve conflict in a healthy way, advocate for themselves, or manage their emotions do it to stay safe from overwhelming emotions. They take on the posture of a stone wall. They are immovable. Perhaps
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Tired? Unsatisfied? Need Juice? Let Go of Your Idealized Self
Are you over-scheduled, tired, have too much stuff, not enough time, don’t like your life, and desperately want to check out to get some “me time?” Maybe it’s because you are pursuing your idealized self. Who Do You Think You Should Be? We all have dreams of what we want to be, and often that